10 Funny Life Quotes That Are Surprisingly Profound

Here are 10 funny life quotes that don’t need an explanation because they can be interpreted in many ways, and I think a lot of them explain themselves.

1. “Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he’ll have to touch it to be sure.” –Murphy’s Law

2. “Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.” -Mignon McLaughlin

3. “Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.” -Brian Gerald O’Driscoll

4. “The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.” -Erma Bombeck

5. “When I die, I want to die like my grandfather, who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.” -Will Rogers

6. “Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.” -Unknown

7. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing — that’s why we recommend it daily.” -Zig Ziglar

8. “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.” -Abraham Lincoln

9. “Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in one ahead.” -Bill McGlashen

10. ”Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 telling them to sit down and shut-up.” -Unknown